More follow up

Or: An area of weakness, humble faith, and fear of failure

One of the realities that Neal Lozano describes concerning deliverance, in the context of the Unbound model but also of deliverance in general, is that it "moves us from an area of bondage to an area of weakness." He says that this sounds bad, and he's right, it does, and he's right again: it isn't. When we know we are weak and we depend on Christ in those areas, then we are actually strong.

When we've struggled in an area for decades of our life, it can be a challenge to have faith that God will really provide victory in the long term. This is an additional reason why faith (along with repentance) is the first key to spiritual freedom: we must believe that God loves us and wants us to know the victory He has won for us. But this victory is different from everything we have learned about winning in our physical and professional lives. We learn that we are victorious when we work harder than our opponents and make our own skills stronger than theirs. It's Fr. Spitzer's "comparative identity" again: we know most of our victories in comparison to others' defeats. (I suppose that this previous post contains my best description of Fr. Spitzer's concept.) Our pride can come into play here, too: most of us want the affirmation that comes from knowing that we have accomplished what we set out to do.

Conversely, we may also need to renounce the spirit of fear - fear of failure - that can further complicate the dynamics of any area of our lives over which we have struggled unsuccessfully. Yielding to this fear can provide an entryway for a spirit of anxiety in our lives, as well. All of these things can be ours to deal with in the flesh, but they can also have a spiritual element that comes to inhabit them and hold us in bondage to our shortcomings. As I write about this, I feel the tension at the base of my skull building, confirming that these weaknesses and spiritual influences have been at work in my life for decades. And now I also recognize them as the schemes of my adversary to keep me from living in the power of Jesus' cross and resurrection in this area of my life.

When I trust that it is better to allow God's victory to have its way in my life than it would be to have any victory on my own, and I truly believe in God who truly wants me to know the joy of leaning on Him each step of the way, then in the Name of Jesus I can renounce the spirits of pride, doubt, fear, anxiety, and impurity, break the hold they have had over my life, and command them to go, and they have no choice but to leave, because I have both revoked the authority I may have previously given them to stay and embraced Jesus' authority over them, under which I am now living.

It may take some time for my own behavioral habit or tendency to fade, but as I turn to God in these moments of temptation, I trust that I will find that His strength will overcome my weakness. Indeed, I must never long for the day when I don't need Him for victory in this area, but rather desire to be more dependent on Him rather than more independent. In this way, I will develop a different habit and tendency to replace the one to which I have been bound for so long, which is a mere side effect of the greater gift of walking more closely with the One who loves me perfectly.

Transforming (phase 4) - The Ascension (step 32) - session 4

Jesus said to his disciples: “Now I am going to him who sent me; yet none of you asks me, `Where are you going?'  But because I have said these things to you, sorrow has filled your hearts. 
Nevertheless I tell you the truth: it is to your advantage that I go away, for if I do not go away, the Counselor will not come to you; but if I go, I will send him to you.  And when he comes, he will convince the world concerning sin and righteousness and judgment: concerning sin, because they do not believe in me; concerning righteousness, because I go to the Father, and you will see me no more; concerning judgment, because the ruler of this world is judged. ” - Jn 16:5-11

Again, these words from the Last Supper discourse precede Jesus' crucifixion, but are just as applicable to his ascension.

Alas, I have no heart to reflect further on them today, except to plead that he would convince those I love concerning sin and righteousness and judgment, and me as well, inasmuch as is necessary.

Transforming (phase 4) - The Ascension (step 32) - session 3b

Continued from yesterday's post, sort of, with some thoughts from yesterday afternoon and last night:

We also, of course, fail to fully grasp the nature of God and of God's love. We think too often in terms of what God wants from us, as if that is some sort of need of God, forgetting that God is fully self-sufficient and is never surprised by anything we do, for he sees everything we're going to do as we do it just as we see everything we have done in the past, except with true clarity of vision unlimited by our restrictions of perception. (Of course, even that plays fast and loose with the concepts of time and eternity, for which we lack the language, which may just be a way of saying that I don't have time right now to consider how better to express eternity. But enough of this eternal tangent.)

So much of our experience of love is wrapped up in having needs that must be met. God loves us without having needs. Therefore, what God asks of us is always about what he wants for us (and the rest of his beloved ones) rather than what he wants from us.  So when someone says that God has everything for us but wants (or even demands) everything from us, they are only partly right. Rather, we are incapable of receiving everything from God while clinging to what we don't want to release to him.

But God, who is rich in mercy, out of the great love with which he loved us even when we were dead through our trespasses, made us alive together with Christ (by grace you have been saved), 
and raised us up with him, and made us sit with him in the heavenly places in Christ Jesus, 
that in the coming ages he might show the immeasurable riches of his grace in kindness toward us in Christ Jesus. - Eph 2:4-7

Really, I just want to draw attention to 6b. Our Lord, whose Body we are, has ascended and is seated at the right hand of the Father. So while God's kingdom is something for which we hope to experience in its fullness at the conclusion of our lives, we also partake of it now, because Christ is with the Father and we are in Christ by the Holy Spirit. The sacraments of our initiation have brought us into a relational union with God in which we grow throughout our lives, and through faith and by the Holy Spirit we are welcomed as fellow participants in the relational nature of God.

And people think that the Ascension isn't so important!

Transforming (phase 4) - The Ascension (step 32) - session 3a

"Truly, truly, I say to you, he who believes in me will also do the works that I do; and greater works than these will he do, because I go to the Father. Whatever you ask in my name, I will do it, that the Father may be glorified in the Son; if you ask anything in my name, I will do it." - (Jn 14:12-14)

This passage was not included in the step, but it seems worth revisiting within this context.

Because Jesus has returned to the Father, we have an Advocate in heaven who has given his very life in his abundant love for us, and a Father who has likewise given his Beloved Son. We must get over the idea that God is an obstacle to our joy, which is based on an utter misunderstanding of the nature of joy, versus happiness or pleasure.  We also have a misunderstanding of the word "name," which in its biblical uses most often means something like "authority."  I believe we do not ask anything in Jesus' name unless we pray as he did:

• desiring nothing more than we do the kingdom of God for ourselves and for all
• trusting that the Father loves and knows us better than we love and know ourselves
• humbly accepting that the Father's ways are better than what we think is best

This is not excuse-making for why God doesn't answer our prayers. I have seen over and over again how prayers are answered in the name of Jesus, and sometimes they are answered exactly as we ask, and at other times they are clearly answered but in completely different ways from how we ask. When what we ask is most in line with God's desires for us to live holy lives rooted in his love is when our prayers are answered most in line with how we ask.

Transforming (phase 4) - The Ascension (step 32) - session 2e

Acts 1:1-12 (cont.)

And when he had said this, as they were looking on, he was lifted up, and a cloud took him out of their sight. And while they were gazing into heaven as he went, behold, two men stood by them in white robes, and said, "Men of Galilee, why do you stand looking into heaven? This Jesus, who was taken up from you into heaven, will come in the same way as you saw him go into heaven." 

Then they returned to Jerusalem from the mount called Olivet, which is near Jerusalem, a sabbath day's journey away. - (9-12)

So, all my thoughts about this passage were actually more about what turned out to be my next reflection . . .

And so the disciples return to Jerusalem to await the promised outpouring of the Holy Spirit. A sabbath day's journey seems to be less than 3/4 mile, a distance which also fits with Jesus and the disciples going there after the Passover supper.

Even with the additional scripture passage which I've added as another session, I may still be a day away from beginning the Pentecost novena, unless I end up having multiple reflections on that passage. If so, perhaps I shall revisit one of the earlier steps from Holy Week which felt as if I gave it short shrift.

Transforming (phase 4) - The Ascension (step 32) - session 2d

Acts 1:1-12 (cont.)

And while staying with them he charged them not to depart from Jerusalem, but to wait for the promise of the Father, which, he said, "you heard from me,  for John baptized with water, but before many days you shall be baptized with the Holy Spirit . . . But you shall receive power when the Holy Spirit has come upon you; and you shall be my witnesses in Jerusalem and in all Judea and Samaria and to the end of the earth." - (4-5, 8)

I think I may revisit these verses in my Pentecost novena, but for now let's just consider the importance of the Holy Spirit and Jesus' ascension.

" . . . if I do not go away, the Counselor will not come to you; but if I go, I will send him to you." - Jn 16:7b

Since these words are from the Last Supper discourse, some have interpreted this specifically to mean that Jesus must die in order to bestow the Holy Spirit, and I'm not arguing against that. Partly, that argument is based on Jesus' appearance to the apostles in chapter 20 of the same gospel, in which Jesus breathes on them and tells them to receive the Holy Spirit.

But what if the full power of the Holy Spirit was somehow stifled within them until Jesus had returned to the Father? Doesn't this make sense, both in the tradition of Elijah and Elisha and in our own knowledge of how remaining in the presence of our mentors can keep us from fully spreading our own wings?  I am not suggesting that God the Holy Spirit is limited in the same way, but that the disciples themselves may have been unable to receive his full power while they were continually comparing themselves to Jesus due to being in his presence.

Whatever the case, Jesus has indicated in several places that the Holy Spirit is another advocate, leading us in all truth and power when Jesus himself is no longer physically around to do so.

Transforming (phase 4) - The Ascension (step 32) - session 2c

Acts 1:1-12 (cont.)

So when they had come together, they asked him, "Lord, will you at this time restore the kingdom to Israel?"

He said to them, "It is not for you to know times or seasons which the Father has fixed by his own authority." - (6-7)

From Moses (Ps 90:13) to David (Ps 6:3), the psalmists implored the Lord: How long? It is often our plea, too: How long must injustice and violence last? Our response to what we perceive to be God's failure to act as he should is too often to take matters into our own hands, answering injustice with impatient overreach - and, therefore, usually another form of injustice.

It isn't that God doesn't want us to act, but that he doesn't want us to over reach, to do wrong in the name of addressing wrong. He wants us to exercise bold humility, putting love into action within appropriate boundaries, and not trying to correct the mistakes we think that he has made.

Transforming (phase 4) - The Ascension (step 32) - session 2b

Acts 1:1-12 (cont.)

Before I pick up with the next verse, another thought about the last verse from yesterday's reflection:

" . . . for John baptized with water, but before many days you shall be baptized with the Holy Spirit." - (5)

This verse hearkens back to Lk 3:16, in which John the Baptist spoke similar words about Jesus to counter the people's inquiry as to whether John himself might be the Messiah. It is as if this second account addresses a gaping hole that was left unfulfilled in Luke's gospel, where the only reference to the bestowing of the Spirit upon the apostles is in the instruction at the end that they should stay in the city until they are clothed with power from on high. Luke then uses this as the launching point for this account of the Spirit's work in the Church.

Transforming (phase 4) - The Ascension (step 32) - session 2a

Acts 1:1-12

In the first book, O Theophilus, I have dealt with all that Jesus began to do and teach, until the day when he was taken up, after he had given commandment through the Holy Spirit to the apostles whom he had chosen. - Acts 1:1-2

It is unclear whether there was additional research via interviews by the author of Luke-Acts between the writing of the gospel and of the Acts of the Apostles. I'm going to continue to refer to that author in the traditional way, as Luke (or sometimes as St. or Dr. Luke).  But it is clear that this work is intended to go beyond Jesus' physical time on earth to the work that his mystical Body, the Church, takes on in his absence. Perhaps this extended time (as compared to that in the gospel) that Jesus spends with the apostles prior to leaving them via his ascension to the Father is intended to lay the groundwork for explaining the work they have done since.

To them he presented himself alive after his passion by many proofs, appearing to them during forty days, and speaking of the kingdom of God. - (1-2)

Perhaps this extended time (as compared to that in the gospel) that Jesus spends with the apostles prior to leaving them via his ascension to the Father is intended to lay the groundwork for explaining the work they have done since. St. Luke doesn't provide the details that St. Paul includes in the Letter to the Corinthians concerning the specific appearances of Jesus in these forty days, yet includes far more detail about this final one.

And while staying with them he charged them not to depart from Jerusalem, but to wait for the promise of the Father, which, he said, "you heard from me, for John baptized with water, but before many days you shall be baptized with the Holy Spirit." - (3-5)

So instead of Jesus' immediate ascension as in the gospel, followed by the disciples praising God with some degree of boldness in the temple, here we have more detailed indications of how they came to be so bold, after more than a month of teaching from Jesus and the outpouring of the Holy Spirit that will be described in great detail in chapter 2.

This is more consistent with the multiple appearances in St. John's gospel, as well. Though Dr. Luke still doesn't take the scene back to Galilee, neither does his general description preclude time there.

Transforming (phase 4) - The Ascension (step 32) - session 1b

Luke 24: 36-53

One other thing to be observed from this session, which I lost a bit in the last reflection by not including more of the immediately preceding verses, is the reason for the disciples to return to Jerusalem with great joy. In Luke's gospel account, the ascension is recorded as having occurred immediately following Jesus' appearance to the gathered disciples following the report of the two disciples from Emmaus. So in this account, their joy may well be rooted in the immediacy of the wonderful news that Jesus is no longer dead.

Transforming (phase 4) - The Ascension (step 32) - session 1a

Then he led them out as far as Bethany, and lifting up his hands he blessed them. While he blessed them, he parted from them, and was carried up into heaven. And they returned to Jerusalem with great joy, and were continually in the temple blessing God. - Lk 24: 50-53

The first of Luke's two accounts of the Lord's Ascension - and Luke was the only canonical writer to record this event - has fewer details than the one in The Acts of the Apostles.

The disciples are not filled with dismay at the Lord's departure from them, as they were when they thought his life had ended in tragedy. They are not sad for themselves at his absence, but rather are now experiencing "great joy."  Have they taken to heart the Lord's words that they should be glad for his sake that he returns to the Father? Blessing God is a hallmark of those who have encountered the risen Lord, even today when we do so by the Holy Spirit. In his gospel account, I think that Luke doesn't separate out the Pentecost experience of the Holy Spirit descending upon the apostles, which emboldened them for the witnessing to which he briefly refers in these last words of the gospel.

This is the last step of the Exercises, and I'm a little disappointed that there isn't one on the Holy Spirit and Pentecost, but I will probably reflect on that between concluding this step sometime before the Feast of the Ascension and Pentecost itself. In fact, I might do a sort of novena of reflecting, and there are plenty of scriptures to turn to for that purpose. I will leave further contemplation of the apostles' joy for then.

Transforming (phase 4) - The Ascension (step 32) - Introduction

The apparitions tangibly show that the Son of God chose to remain human forever, prove that humanity is destined to enter eternal life, a fact that should lead to a new appreciation of the dignity of each human being. - Orientation, Step 32: The Ascension, Step-by-step Retreats

There are only a couple scripture passages included in this phase, and not much material for reflection.  I might spend a couple days on this introduction. I've spent too little time reflecting on the full implications of this wonderful mystery, so I will probably also revisit a quote or two from the Last Supper discourse that also shine light on the importance of this tenet of our faith.

But this one sentence, this phrase that starts it, smacked me upside the head! I suppose that many Catholics, like me, have this misconception - never really fully considered, let alone voiced - that Jesus was fully human when he walked on the earth prior to his crucifixion, but that when he rose, or certainly by the time he ascended, he stopped being human. Maybe we think he became superhuman. I'm not sure I can fully get my mind around the idea that Jesus is eternally human, and I think I need to be okay with that. But yes, this also means that I truly am eternal, as is every human being.

And yes, this affects the dignity with which I need to revere all others.

Transforming (phase 4) - Jesus appears to the disciples on the lakeshore (step 31) - session 3

(H)e appeared to Cephas, then to the twelve. Then he appeared to more than five hundred brethren at one time, most of whom are still alive, though some have fallen asleep. Then he appeared to James, then to all the apostles. Last of all, as to one untimely born, he appeared also to me. - (1 Cor 15: 5b-8)

I'm not sure what the purpose is for having this reading as part of this step (and it only calls for verses 6-8). To me, the important part of this scripture passage comes follows in later verses:

Now if Christ is preached as raised from the dead, how can some of you say that there is no resurrection of the dead? But if there is no resurrection of the dead, then Christ has not been raised; if Christ has not been raised, then our preaching is in vain and your faith is in vain. We are even found to be misrepresenting God, because we testified of God that he raised Christ, whom he did not raise if it is true that the dead are not raised. For if the dead are not raised, then Christ has not been raised. If Christ has not been raised, your faith is futile and you are still in your sins. Then those also who have fallen asleep in Christ have perished. If for this life only we have hoped in Christ, we are of all men most to be pitied. 

But in fact Christ has been raised from the dead, the first fruits of those who have fallen asleep.- (12-21)

One of the things I find most compelling about the apostles' testimony is that they don't try to make themselves out as something they aren't. They have included their warts: Peter's denial, Thomas' doubt - indeed, that of all the disciples, their collective abandonment of Jesus at his arrest, Saul's persecution of the church. If the resurrection were a falsehood, surely they would have taken the opportunity to present themselves in a better light, too. Paul, of course, would not have had that luxury, as there were too many contemporaries who were all too familiar with his persecution of the church. And in the verses I've skipped, we hear him bragging a little about how hard he has worked in light of the nature of his sins. But by and large, the New Testament writings do not present the followers of Jesus in the best possible light.

If this life is all there is, then our experiences in this world are all that matter, and we should maximize our joy so long as it doesn't diminish the joy of others. This is why we are to be pitied, because we preach a far different message from this and live a radically different approach to life.

Transforming (phase 4) - Jesus appears to the disciples on the lakeshore (step 31) - session 2

Now the eleven disciples went to Galilee, to the mountain to which Jesus had directed them. And when they saw him they worshiped him; but some doubted. And Jesus came and said to them, "All authority in heaven and on earth has been given to me. Go therefore and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit, teaching them to observe all that I have commanded you; and lo, I am with you always, to the close of the age." - Mt 28:16-20

St. Matthew records only two resurrection appearances of Jesus: the first to Mary and Mary; and this one to the disciples in Galilee, where he had told the women to have them go. Having spent the last few days in John's gospel, we might think, "How can they still have doubted after the appearances in Jerusalem?" But there are no such appearances in this gospel; in this case, some doubted because they are encountering the risen Lord for the first time.

This gospel, of course, concludes with the great commission. Sometimes I think we put a greater emphasis on advancing the American Dream.

Transforming (phase 4) - Jesus appears to the disciples on the lakeshore (step 31) - session 1f

Jn 21 (cont.)

Peter turned and saw following them the disciple whom Jesus loved, who had lain close to his breast at the supper and had said, "Lord, who is it that is going to betray you?"

When Peter saw him, he said to Jesus, "Lord, what about this man?" 

Jesus said to him, "If it is my will that he remain until I come, what is that to you? Follow me!" 

The saying spread abroad among the brethren that this disciple was not to die; yet Jesus did not say to him that he was not to die, but, "If it is my will that he remain until I come, what is that to you?" 

This is the disciple who is bearing witness to these things, and who has written these things; and we know that his testimony is true. - (20-24)

It seems to me that this story would be important if, as most scholars hold, St. John's gospel didn't take it's final form - and especially if Chapter 21 were not added - until after his death. Even if he wrote it himself near the end of his life, it would be important for him to address any belief in the community that the Lord would return before his passing.

But the important part for us is probably in verse 22: why do we focus so much on the blessing which others receive? Why do we long for a miracle of our own, or for a certainty in our faith that others seem to possess? What is that to us? We are to follow Jesus in the role he has for us.

But there are also many other things which Jesus did; were every one of them to be written, I suppose that the world itself could not contain the books that would be written. - (20-25)

If Jesus is who we believe him to be, it is of course impossible for the world to contain all the books that would be written, in addition to containing itself, all of which he has done!

Transforming (phase 4) - Jesus appears to the disciples on the lakeshore (step 31) - session 1e

Jn 21 (cont.)

"Truly, truly, I say to you, when you were young, you girded yourself and walked where you would; but when you are old, you will stretch out your hands, and another will gird you and carry you where you do not wish to go." (This he said to show by what death he was to glorify God.) And after this he said to him, "Follow me." - (18-19)

Jesus now indicates to Peter the reason why it is so important that Peter know that he is acting out of love for the Lord, not out of mere obligation. Merely being connected to Jesus because of following him for these years and seeing his miracles - having a sense that this is someone that Peter desperately wants to be dedicated to, to the point of giving his all for Jesus - did not keep him from failing to fulfill his expressed willingness to lay down his own life for the Lord. Peter needs to be moved beyond affection and idealism and obligation to the unwavering north star of love. Any lesser motivation would cause him to ultimately shrink again in the face of the trials to come. And Jesus wants Peter to know that he is not the same man, driven by the same inadequate desires, but is now a true disciple motivated by love.

And now, when Jesus says "Follow me," there is no mistaking what that means. All of those things that he has said - there being no greater love than to lay down one's life for a friend; the extent to which he calls us to serve one another; sending the disciples as the Father had sent him - are now in the context of his crucifixion sacrifice and his resurrection from the dead. 

Will I follow?

Transforming (phase 4) - Jesus appears to the disciples on the lakeshore (step 31) - session 1d

Jn 21 (cont.)

This was now the third time that Jesus was revealed to the disciples after he was raised from the dead. 

When they had finished breakfast, Jesus said to Simon Peter, "Simon, son of John, do you love me more than these?" He said to him, "Yes, Lord; you know that I love you." He said to him, "Feed my lambs."

A second time he said to him, "Simon, son of John, do you love me?" He said to him, "Yes, Lord; you know that I love you." He said to him, "Tend my sheep." 

He said to him the third time, "Simon, son of John, do you love me?" Peter was grieved because he said to him the third time, "Do you love me?" And he said to him, "Lord, you know everything; you know that I love you." Jesus said to him, "Feed my sheep . . . . " - (14-17)

I presume that this was Jesus third appearance to the gathered disciples. From the other gospels, there is also Emmaus, the appearance to Mary outside the tomb, and an appearance to Simon Peter, all of which would have happened before this appearance. 

I heard a priest once homilize that there is a different Greek word for "love" in Peter's replies than in Jesus' first two queries, and that the third time Jesus switches and uses the same word which Peter had used. This is consistent with a quick glance at the text in an interlinear Greek-English bible online, where it also appears that, the third time, Peter is quoted as using yet a different word in response. 

All of this ignores a key fact: this conversation almost certainly didn't happen in Greek. But since this story was handed down by St. John to his followers, who likely set it down in writing, we should probably accept that the Greek reflects a dynamic in the exchange which John conveyed to his listeners.

Others have focused on the threefold affirmation which Jesus affords Peter in contradiction of his previous threefold denial, but enough has been said about this.

For me, it is more helpful to consider this in light of the things upon which I've recently reflected. (I'm reading between the lines here, and hope you do, too:) Peter must feel that he has been demonstrating his love for Jesus in unmistakable, practical ways: jumping overboard and swimming to shore; hauling the huge catch of fish ashore by himself when Jesus told the disciples to bring him some. How could the Lord now shame him by repeatedly questioning his love? But perhaps Peter's actions were motivated by feeling as if he now owed the Lord a debt he could never repay; painful experience tells me this dedication is not nearly the same thing as love. If this was true for him, he'd be even more hurt by - and defensive about - the threefold interrogation he receives.

When someone has forgiven us the unforgivable, we may respond in a deep, thankful love that sustains our dedication to them for the remainder of our lives, but that dedication may instead arise out of a heavy obligation that eventually begins to feel like a chain binding us in slavery. We can feel as if we must now live up to, or retroactively "earn," the grace we have been freely given. Peter may have been acting out of this sort of motivation, but Jesus needed for him to be motivated by deep love instead of guilt. 

Though it may be true - as Jesus explains in defending the sinful woman who anoints him in Luke 7 - that those who are forgiven more love more, it can be very difficult for a forgiven offender to even think to consider whether they are now motivated by love or by a sense of shame-driven obligation. Perhaps Jesus' intent here is to give Peter an important chance to shift his motivations.

Transforming (phase 4) - Jesus appears to the disciples on the lakeshore (step 31) - session 1c

Jn 21 (cont.)

That disciple whom Jesus loved said to Peter, "It is the Lord!" When Simon Peter heard that it was the Lord, he put on his clothes, for he was stripped for work, and sprang into the sea. - (7)

This one verse should be a lesson in modesty for us.

John, the one who saw and believed at the empty tomb, is the one who first recognizes Jesus at the seashore. (Of course, he's also the writer of the gospel . . . ) But Peter, to whom Luke says the Lord had already appeared and who had presumably been reconciled, is the one who leaps (now clothed!) into the sea in his eagerness to be with him. The gift of our forgiveness brings us an unbridled enthusiasm and love, as we saw when Jesus was anointed (by either Mary or the unnamed sinful woman). 

But the other disciples came in the boat, dragging the net full of fish, for they were not far from the land, but about a hundred yards off.  When they got out on land, they saw a charcoal fire there, with fish lying on it, and bread.  Jesus said to them, "Bring some of the fish that you have just caught."  So Simon Peter went aboard and hauled the net ashore, full of large fish, a hundred and fifty-three of them; and although there were so many, the net was not torn. - (8-11)

Again, it is Simon Peter who demonstrates his love for the Lord by his obedience. But there must be some other symbolism here, too. Just in case there is a reader who hasn't heard the suggestion that there were 153 known varieties of fish, this has been interpreted to suggest that the Church was meant to include all people. But if that is the case, what does it say that Peter alone hauls the net ashore with its overloaded catch? Doesn't this underscore Peter's role as leader of the early Church?

Transforming (phase 4) - Jesus appears to the disciples on the lakeshore (step 31) - session 1b

Jn 21 (cont.)

Just as day was breaking, Jesus stood on the beach; yet the disciples did not know that it was Jesus.

Jesus said to them, "Children, have you any fish?" They answered him, "No."  

He said to them, "Cast the net on the right side of the boat, and you will find some." So they cast it, and now they were not able to haul it in, for the quantity of fish. - (4-6)

"Have you found what you are looking for? Look here and you will find it!"

Assuming, of course, that we are looking for something good. We often don't. We ask God for things that are not good for us, and we get upset when he doesn't provide them.

But we also seek things that are good in the wrong place, or in a way that destroys their goodness. I can't help but think about those who are rioting in Baltimore tonight in the name of "justice." What was done to Freddy Gray was a terrible wrong, and those who did it should be held accountable. But what the looters and rioters are doing is not justified. The wheels of justice grind slowly; i

t took two years for a conviction on the Boston Marathon bombing. Rage, however, especially in response to powerlessness, is impatient. 

Transforming (phase 4) - Jesus appears to the disciples on the lakeshore (step 31) - session 1a

Jn 21

After this Jesus revealed himself again to the disciples by the Sea of Tiberias, (1a)

The first question that came to my mind was, "Okay, where's the Sea of Tiberius?" A moment's quick research indicates that this is also referred to in the New Testament as the Lake of Gennesaret and the Sea of Galilee. I should not have reached this point in my life without knowing this. At any rate, this is about 60 miles from Jerusalem, and given that the disciples walked pretty much everywhere they went, this appearance would've had to occur at least a couple days after those mentioned in chapter 20. 

and he revealed himself in this way. Simon Peter, Thomas called the Twin, Nathan'a-el of Cana in Galilee, the sons of Zeb'edee, and two others of his disciples were together. Simon Peter said to them, "I am going fishing." They said to him, "We will go with you." They went out and got into the boat; but that night they caught nothing. - (1b-3)

We must be careful about combining the gospels, but this is a case in which reading from a combination of the gospels makes sense, since both Matthew's and Mark's accounts have the disciples instructed to return to Galilee. It isn't surprising that they would, anyway, being from there. But this should help keep us from reading too much significance into their resumption of fishing.  While it might indicate that they were returning to their old lives, it does not necessarily mean this. They may have just been engaging in a familiar activity as they attempted to make sense of what they had experienced. Also, I tend to assume that one of the other disciples not mentioned by name may have been Andrew - it would make sense for Simon Peter's brother to go with him.