The attitude of Nazareth, cont. (corrected)

Okay, perhaps the latter part of this post tends to obscure the first part, which is the message I really need to pay more attention to if I'm to not consign myself to living as a slave to the feelings at the end.  There's some good meat in there, though I was wondering if maybe I'd gotten ahead of myself/the Church a little by focusing on what was coming,  After all, Jesus' neighbors' response to him wasn't part of Sunday's Gospel, yet I found myself focusing on how applicable that reading is to our own lives and the reasons why we often fail to hear that this word is fulfilled in our hearing it.  I'm sure I've blogged on "hear" before in the context of Ps 95.  It means more than physical hearing, but understanding, as well.  "This passage" is indeed fulfilled to the degree that we hear and apply it to our own lives.  But just when I thought I'd plumbed too far and wouldn't have anything left for the coming week, we found fresh insight when we read the Gospel for this coming Sunday.

First, it is probably good for us to understand some of the religious, social and psychological perspective ot Nazareth.  As I understand it, the entire northern part of the kingdom of Israel was looked down upon by the Jews of the south because of their intermarriage and resulting idolatry following the conquering of the northern kingdom by Assyria, and these people's opposition to the repatriation of the southern kingdom following the Babylonian exile.  Galilee, north of Samaria, was disrespected right along with it as being impure in blood and faith, and Nazareth was considered basically considered the scum of Galilee.

Then one of their own sons goes abroad, and back come tales of the wonders that he has worked.  Now, the people must have thought, we're finally going to get the respect we deserve!  This miracle worker will show them that we aren't scum!  Yet they were also skeptical: it isn't as if three decades would erase the scandalous circumstances of Jesus' birth from their collective memory.  Surely no rose of deliverance could blossom from such sinful roots?  Ironically, the people of Nazareth use the same skepticism that Nathanael  would use when initially decried, "Nazareth! Can anything good come from there?" carrying it to the point of the later out-of-hand judgment and rejection of the Pharisees, "Look into it, and you will find that a prophet does not come out of Galilee."

This, then, is the sort of judgment we often use against ourselves - and against each other - to limit the ways we believe God will work in our own lives.  It becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy of doubt, and is what I referred to in my previous post as "the trap of Nazareth."

And even when we dare to share in the hope that they initially express, - "All spoke well of him and were amazed at the gracious words that came from his lips." - we also tend to look for incontrovertible evidence that we are not placing vain hope in something that we have seen to be so flawed.  How can I be individually a part of the anointed Body of Christ, when I have seen how utterly, undeniably unworthy I am of such a role?  We sometimes want proof that God is working powerfully in our lives, and in the absence of some sort of miracle we interpret each stumbling as evidence that he is not.

In response to the signs for which Jesus knows his neighbors and kinfolk are seeking, he seems to offer a rebuke, invoking most renowned works of two of the greatest ancient prophets of Israel - even of their own region - and pointing out that these works did not benefit the many needy of their native land who were in similar need to the ones who were so blessed.  No wonder they wanted to throw him off a cliff!

But once again, their history is not so important as what it reveals about our own faith journey.  I am reminded of our visiting priest on Epiphany this year, who talked about what it truly meant for Israel to be God's chosen people.  They viewed it as a mark of privilege for their own benefit, that God would always be their provider and defender, at the expense of those around them.  "We are chosen, and therefore you are not!"  Yet this priest emphasized that what it means for us to be God's people is actually something very different.  Israel was, and we are, to be a light to the nations.  This is what it means to belong to God.  It isn't that we are privy to great wonders wrought on our behalf, but that we have the unfathomable privilege of God's light shining through our lives, of participating in his plan of salvation!  The wondrous works God has done have always been primarily about revealing his love to those who do not know him.  Thus it was for Jesus, too, and when we look for those works for some other purpose - for our own benefit or blessing - we may find ourselves angry at God for not serving us according to our own will.

So no, being a disciple of of Christ doesn't mean we will be free of the circumstances that are faced by many others around us who don't follow him.  It doesn't mean we are superior to them.  Rather, it means allowing God to be present in and work through our lives in whatever way best reveals the light of his glory to those who are still struggling, whether those ways be mundane or marvelous.  It always means having someone close to us who lends us strength and peace in the midst of even the darkest of our circumstances.  And it means continuing to follow rather than being filled with despair or anger when our prayers are not answered in the way we deem best.

But we can be assured that the Holy Spirit will reveal the Father's glorious plan of salvation no matter how humble our beginnings, no matter how great our failures, no matter how people might judge us or we might judge ourselves.  God's plan for us is always greater than we can imagine!

Today's word

mala fide \mal-uh-FYE-dee\ - with or in bad faith

I recognized what this word must mean right away, though I'd never encountered it before.  I was surprised, however, by its correct pronunciation, and that of it's sibling bona fide \boh-nuh-FYE-dee\, which I don't believe I've ever heard pronounced properly.

What does that mean?

Truth is not now, nor has it ever been, a matter of popular opinion.

I keep reading about how the Republican Party needs to change in accordance with the mandate of the people.  Basically, it's always how it needs to be more liberal.

I personally think the one Democratic Party we have is one too many already.

Today's words

nomothetic \nah-muh-THET-ik\ - relating to, involving, or dealing with abstract, general, or universal statements or laws

ideographic \ih'-dee-uh-GRAF-ik\ - relating to or dealing with something concrete, individual, or unique

Two great new words from one WOTD article.

of two minds

So I'm trying to figure out how I can say something like this, as I did last week:

We must avoid the trap of Nazareth.  We're told in this week's readings that we are collectively the Body of Christ and individually parts of it.  Then we hear that we have been anointed by the Spirit of God to bring glad tidings and healing, release and comfort, liberty and recovery of sight.  Yes, Jesus is indicating that these things apply to him, but we are his Body, so they apply to us, too, both collectively and individually.  The people of Nazareth would hear Jesus apply this ancient scripture, and they knew him, they thought.  This was Joseph's son.  They'd seen him grow up before their eyes.  The thought they knew his story, so his history interfered with their ability to recognize him for who he really is.  

The same thing happens to us.  Well do we know our own history, and it has too often not the been story of Christ's presence in the world.  Last week we heard the clouds open and the Father proclaim that He is well pleased, but we don't think either of these messages applies to us.  Our familiarity with our own story as we have experienced it interferes with our ability to hear the applicability of these messages to our lives.

 . . . and the next day and the next week, feel so hopeless. I mean, my team is in the Super Bowl, we're planning a short-notice party for Sunday, and mostly I'd really rather just curl up in a ball somewhere.  I'm not sure if it's just physical weariness or a general ennui more deeply rooted in my life, but being the joyful, beloved presence of Christ in the world feels far from me right now.

Messing up a blog coincidence

Before I wrote this post, I had 11, 087 hits on 1,187 posts.  Just more number weirdness.

Javert's dilemma

Have I seriously not blogged about Les Miserables?

I had a couple quibbles with the film, along with one major objection.  First, the quibbles: if I never hear Hugh Jackman sing another note through his nose, that will be okay.  That said: I thought his singing was passable, at least, and his acting was so far superior to his singing that I am glad he got this role.  My second quibble was with Russell Crowe as Javert, who seemed so vocally intimidated (just noticed "timid" in the middle of that word for the first time; duh) that he conveyed neither the certainty of his character through most of the story nor the contrast of his inner conflict at the end.  When he stepped off the bridge, while it was tragic, it felt impersonal, somehow, as I never felt I was connected with the person of Javert.  More on this, as I think I can really relate to this character in ways that transcend Crowe's performance.

But first, my major objection: can we please stop treating "love at first sight" like a noble thing?  Marius was really willing to leave the Resistance at this point in his relationship with Cosette?  Really?  At this point they had nothing more than an attraction for each other.  This had to have more development in the book than it received in the film.  Animal magnetism is not a virtue.

That out of the way, I'd like to return my thoughts to Javert's quandary, which obviously arose out of the conflict he could not resolve involving the inviolability of the law, the definition of evil, and a concept he utterly denied: the unalienable dignity of each human person.  (Okay, I'm sure with some thought I could come up with a summary that more closely reflects these issues as Javert experienced them; but I am writing from my own perspective, after all.)  His entire view of the world was deeply rooted in his convictions about human character and the nature of good and evil.  Obedience to the law was the only evidence of good that mattered, and violating it was incontrovertible proof that you were evil.  Solzhenitsyn's observation that the line between good and evil runs through every human heart would have seemed ridiculous to Javert.  I'm struck by his sense of certainty, his absolute conviction that there is no such thing as a circumstantial criminal, but that rather all criminals are primarily made by a fundamental and unchangeable flaw in their nature. The difference between the class of criminals and that of law-abiding citizens was purely the existence of this weakness, which could never be overcome.  The twisted nature of criminals would eventually work its evil no matter what transpired in their lives.  Therefore, it was essential that society protect itself from the harm of criminals by restricting their opportunity to commit future crimes, for it was inevitable that they would do so if they had a chance.  Furthermore, all violations of the law indicate the same flaw in human nature, an elevation of self over the good of society, such that every offense must be punished and every offender monitored.

So long as he was dealing with others' offenses against the law, his absolutism served him well both in his internal and external duties.  There was a clear line over which he must never cross, as should have been illustrated early  in the movie as he walked the ledge.  He was there not because he was enamored of the idea of stepping off, but because of how it reinforced his certainty of himself.  He knew, to the core of his being, that he was secure there; he would never step across the line.  The ledge was supposed to represent the danger of absolutism from the beginning, though Javert was not to recognize it.  Instead, in the film this seems to come across - either through Crowe's tepid performance or Hooper's direction - as an inner struggle that was waging even early in the movie, when I do not believe this was case for the character of Javert. His crisis would come later, and his certainty would be its crux.  By making Javert appear uncertain of himself early on, Crowe and Hooper undermine his crisis.  They also make his virtue - his commitment to the law is indeed virtuous, in a self-righteous sort of way - seem painted on rather than deep.

As long as Javert could dismiss Valjean's transformation as conditional and his righteous acts as self-serving, and particularly as long as Javert was not swayed to any dereliction of his own duty, he was fine.  To Javert, the law defines virtue, and as long as we uphold it we acts virtuously, as does he.

Yet Javert understands unconsciously that acting outside of one's own self-interest is also incontrovertible evidence of virtue, and it is Valjean's ultimate ability to do so that finally breaks Javert's self-certainty.  He finally cannot bring himself to capture (again) this man who repeatedly acts for the good of others when there is no gain in it whatsoever for himself.  In particular, the one act of mercy displayed to him, in contradiction of Valjean's own personal interest, results in Javert himself violating the law by refusing to apprehend this parole violator. His good deeds as shop owner, caring citizen, mayor, surrogate father, (and so on, in the book, evidently) were easy for the inspector to disregard as somehow self-serving, but in their final confrontation Javert has become convinced enough by Valjean's conversion that he is unable to act according to the law's commands - according to how he has always and unwaveringly defined virtue - and there is no authority to which he may submit his offense.

(I'd really like to read Hugo's book for more on his view on this.  I understand he includes entire essays expositing the moral underpinnings of his story.)

The trap of absolutism is dangerous.  It isn't that there aren't moral absolutes; rather, even scripture warns us not to judge others - or ourselves - according to them.  This is what a good friend realized when she worked so diligently to help me stop being so hard on myself.  When we insist on judging, we block mercy's healing, redemptive power.

Absolutism can take many forms, and being free from one of them doesn't prevent falling victim to another.

The Sacred Heart is the wine cellar of the Precious Blood.

Today's word

engagé \ahn-gah-ZHAY\ - committed to or supportive of a cause

I'd have gotten this in a moment if I'd ever seen it in context, but this is new for me nonetheless.

Red sky at morning . . .

. . .  sailor, take warning. - ancient mariners' rhyme

(Jesus) replied, “When evening comes, you say, ‘It will be fair weather, for the sky is red,’ and in the morning, ‘Today it will be stormy, for the sky is red and overcast.’ You know how to interpret the appearance of the sky, but you cannot interpret the signs of the times." - Mt 16, 2-3

“ . . . Like a red morn that ever yet betokened,
Wrack to the seaman, tempest to the field,
Sorrow to the shepherds, woe unto the birds,
Gusts and foul flaws to herdmen and to herds.” - Shakespeare, Venus and Adonis

A person who knows he should be living like this but who feels like he just. can't. might just find himself in real trouble, sooner or later, if he doesn't figure out how to.

Today's words

zarzuela \zahr-ZWAY-luh\ - a usually comic Spanish operetta

A completely new word for me (unless perhaps I've forgotten it since high school Spanish class.)


euchre \YOO-ker\ - 1. to prevent from winning three tricks in the card game euchre   2. to cheat or trick

Having lived in Ohio for most of the last 26 years, I have become familiar with both the card game and the first definition of this verb.  I imagine those from outside the midwest may be unfamiliar with the game, as I was before moving here.  But even I was not aware of the more generic second definition; I'd certainly be careful of the audience in which I used it.

Wounds that heal - a thought from Thursday night

Our theme was Healing in the Precious Blood of Jesus.  Fr. Angelo mentioned reference after reference describing the understanding of blood in ancient cultures and its significance in ancient ritual.  Then he talked about Jesus' healing ministry, those who were made whole through his compassion and care.  He talked about how much of Jesus' healing was rooted in correcting one form of blindness or another (which I found a particularly fascinating tie-in with Fr. Bramlage's healing ministry, which is so deeply rooted in the damaging effects of unforgiveness in our lives).  I wish I'd had a notebook to capture more of what he shared. He moved on to discuss the redemptive and healing nature of Jesus' sacrifice, and introduced two words together that just struck me: Healing Wounds.  I immediately knew I'd want to reflect and expand on his comments about this idea.

The natural effect of wounds we receive is to tear apart, to destroy, so most wounds are therefore destructive by nature.  While our bodies are equipped to heal in remarkable ways, the wounds themselves are a cause of damage.  This is true of emotional wounds that we receive, as well. Interestingly, the more compromised we are physically or emotionally, the less able we are to heal.

And yet the way we respond to harm we receive - indeed, our willingness to embrace them rather than resist them, in some cases - can cause the resulting wounds to be healing instead of destructive.  As we assume an attitude of grace and forgiveness instead of clinging to the hurt we receive, our wounds' harmful effects in us are diminished, and their redemptive, healing effects are magnified in our own lives as well as the lives of those around us.

For instance, when I focus on how unfair a situation in my relationship with my wife may be, our marriage is undermined and wounded.  But if I instead view that exact same situation as an opportunity to love my wife, it becomes a cause of growth for us.  This is true for each situation in which we decide to respond with an attitude of grace rather than focusing on ourselves.

Jesus' wounds remain visible in his resurrected body because they have lost the power to hurt him while taking on the power to heal us.  His wounds were healing for Thomas, who had declared that he could not believe Jesus was risen without their evidence, and they are healing for us.  This becomes true for the wounds we receive, as well, when we offer forgiveness and mercy rather than retribution in response to them.  Our woundedness can be a source of healing, and inspiration for others who need to experience healing as we have.

First take on Lance

First of all, it has been obvious to me for a long time that Lance Armstrong was guilty of doping.  I'm not one to paint people with a black-and-white palette, so I never concluded that makes him an evil person, but there was no question that he did some incredibly hurtful things in his attempts to cover up his actions.  In fact, even before the evidence became overwhelming, the things that he was saying in his desperation to bolster his image revealed important things about his character that undermined his efforts to appear innocent and terribly wronged.  Publicizing Greg LeMond's private revelation to him was probably the tipping point for me.  What could a truly innocent person have hoped to gain from that?  It was the act of someone whose thinking was muddled by their desperation to preserve their carefully crafted but increasingly tenuous illusion.

I haven't seen his interview yet - last night I had more important plans - so maybe I should withhold this opinion.  Still, there was an important lesson in my own therapy that I can't help considering as I read some of what he said: a person who really accepting responsibility for their own actions is doesn't talk about the harm they've done as a circumstance that "just happened."

So when Lance says of Betsy Andreu and her husband that they're not at peace, "because they've been hurt too badly," rather than "Because I hurt them too badly," it indicates that he's made progress, but isn't quite there yet.  Likewise, of Emma O'Reilly: "She's one of these people that got run over, got bullied,"  rather than, "one of those people I ran over and bullied."  Also, he's still justifying his initial decision to dope in the first place.

These may seem like small things, and probably only someone who has done that kind of work would ever notice them.  (Well, maybe not the justification; most people recognize that part.) I'm not being critical of him, though; none of us gets there in one giant leap.  It's good - for him, and in general - that he recognizes his actions as bullying, and that he is beginning to speak the truth.

Today's words

vernissage \vair-nih-SAHZH\ - a private showing or preview of an art exhibition

It's as if the editors of Merriam-Webster's website seriously resolved to give me great new words of the day this year.

peafowl - either of two very large terrestrial pheasants (Pavo cristatus and P. muticus) of southeastern Asia and India that are often reared as ornamental fowls

peahen - a female peafowl

The peacock is the more familiar member of the family.  Can't remember where I ran into these two . . .

Today's words

kanban \KAHN-bahn\ - a manufacturing strategy wherein parts are produced or delivered only as needed

inchmeal \INCH-meel\ - little-by-little, gradually

quadrate \KWAH-drayt\ - being square or approximately square

Would have definitely guessed the last two, even though they're both new to me.  (None of these, however, are recognized by blogger's spell checker.)

ugh

Don't you suppose it might have been nice to let me know in advance that last night would be our last night alone together before you go?

(Seeing as you're never going to see this here, and we won't have another chance to talk alone before you go, I've texted it to you, too.)

Prayer challenge

Sitting down to spend some quiet time in prayer to start the morning is not the same thing as actually praying.  It was apparently the best I could manage today, though, as distractions in my mind ran rampant.  I hope that improves in the days ahead.  I need to take out some prayer tools again, I guess, though I was hoping just to pray in the faint and growing natural light of the morning.

Of course, the importance of that prayer is not in my accomplishing anything in that time, but just in spending time in God's presence and listening to his voice.  I just feel like I haven't quite gotten there the last couple mornings.

Guitarists and Pinball Wizards

Today's word

taradiddle \tair-uh-DID-ul\ 1. a trivial or childish lie : fib  2. pretentious nonsense

If I said I was familiar with this word before seeing it on today's WOTD, it would be pure taradiddle.

Intentions matter

Realizing that I need the quiet time with God that I've been neglecting this Christmas season - why do I always seem to follow up a great Advent or Lent with a letdown of my guard? - I began the day with a bit of prayer time in the dark.

At the end of my work day, I find myself far removed from my peaceful beginning.

But I must remember that time with the Lord is not primarily a means of making my life better.  It is primarily for its own sake, primarily because God is deserving of my attention and also because I am better off for it.

A year after . . .

. . . The Saga of the Two Trees:

We had a much better tree hunting experience this year.

First off, there was no way we were putting our dog at risk again, so he stayed home.

Secondly, there was no way we were putting my wife's surgically repaired knee at risk, especially with our vacation on tap for the following week, so she stayed home, too.  She and the dog kept each other company.

Thirdly, because we were leaving on vacation and would be gone the next two weekends, we got our tree earlier in the season than we ever have before.  The selection was way better, and middle daughter and I found a pretty nice tree after only about ten minutes of walking and another five or ten of looking.

I was a little concerned that cutting it down so early in the season would cause it to start dropping needles pretty badly before we were ready to take it down, but that wasn't the case.  It held up really well.  The decision to use the stand with the larger reservoir proved fortuitous ("for-chew-ishus," as Bert said in Mary Poppins?) when our daughter had to quit taking care of it while she was in the hospital and we were still out of town.  It had slowed its uptake by then, and the stand never ran dry.  Still, we didn't leave it up through Epiphany as we have in past years, but took it out on Saturday of that weekend instead.

So it looks like the secret to finding a suitable tree isn't to go on a bitterly cold day, as I'd concluded in the past - it was actually pretty nice day on December 1st, when we got it.  Rather, in the future we're just going to have to go before everyone else does!

Today's words

realia \ree-AL-ee-uh\ - objects or activities used to relate classroom teaching to the real life especially of peoples studied

(Wow.  Four days in a row.)

parietal \puh-RYE-uh-tul\ - 1a. of or relating to the walls of a part or cavity  b. of, relating to, or forming the upper posterior wall of the head  2. attached to the main wall rather than the axis or a cross wall of a plant ovary — used of an ovule or a placenta  3. of or relating to college living or its regulation; especially : of or relating to the regulations governing the visiting privileges of members of the opposite sex in campus dormitories

Another one from vacation.  This one from our 100000₂ anniversary.  I only knew the 1b. definition.

Today's words

Apollonian \ap-uh-LOH-nee-un\ - 1. of, relating to, or resembling the god Apollo  2. harmonious, measured, ordered, or balanced in character

pomander \POH-man-der\ - 1. a mixture of aromatic substances enclosed in a perforated bag or box and used to scent clothes and linens or formerly carried as a guard against infection; also : a clove-studded orange or apple used for the same purposes  2. a box or hollow fruit-shaped ball for holding pomander

The second word was actually the WOTD a month ago, when I wasn't paying attention because of the natural beauty by which I found myself surrounded.

As for the first word, I definitely knew its first definition, but wouldn't have guessed its second; now that I know that it wasn't necessarily very applicable to Apollo, either - at least in the temperamental sense - I'm not sure how I'll manage to recall it in the future.

Ok, I was ready to leave, too.

But not for this.

Today's word

buttonhole \BUT-un-hohl\ - to detain in conversation by or as if by holding on to the outer garments of

I seem to want to confuse this one with "pigeonhole."  You'd think, as often as this one happens to me on the way out the door from work, I'd keep it straight.

Today's word

ramify \RAM-uh-fye\ - 1. to split up into branches or constituent parts  2. to send forth branches or extensions  3. to cause to branch

I never really understood the etymology of the word "ramifications" until I saw today's WOTD.

Seeing more clearly

Have just realized, practically in the moment and without a moment of conflict, that a "story of my life" incident that just happened in my kitchen is probably more significant for the way I interpreted it in the worst possible light than for the actual thing that transpired.

I'm too old for this, but still

I was really glad when my oldest and her husband asked if I could help them with a tiling project.  They'd been planning it for a while, but the project took on a fresh urgency when they had a sewage backup last week. I've been looking for chances to nurture our relationship together, and I thought this might be a good way to do it.

It worked out great.  I went over there Friday night and we laid out and cut all the tiles, then went back Saturday morning and we installed them.  My daughter grouted on Sunday, and the result looks great.  Professional, even. And they seemed to really appreciate my help; my son-in-law said he couldn't have done it without me.  He gained some valuable experience that he can put to use when he does the other bathroom.

Now I'm a sore puppy, but it was worth it.

(truth-in-advertising moment: sore old dog.)

1 Cor 13, 5c

(Love) is not irritable or resentful. - RSV
It does not brood over injury. - NAB
(Love) thinketh no evil. - KJV
(Love) doesn't keep score of the sins of others. - The Message
(Love) does not impute evil. - Darby
(Love) does not take into account a wrong suffered. - NASB
It keeps no record of wrongs. - NIV

Nor of shortcomings, or not, at least, in the way I tend to.

It has been too long since I've taken a look at various translations of a verse of scripture. This isn't even a full verse, yet it provides plenty of food for thought, and ties in with Fr. Dave's homily of last weekend.

I often correct myself in the middle of making mental lists: things I do, things I'm the only one who can do, things that another doesn't do.  It isn't just a characteristic of my marriage relationship, either - for instance, I generally know who has bought lunch last. Add to that: I also have a tendency to interpret others' actions or omissions in the worst possible light (imputing evil).

From a strictly secular perspective, all of this forms an unhealthy approach to love.  From the Christian perspective, St. Paul seems to be telling me that it isn't how to love at all.

Still growing . . .

That's a good thing, right?

Not an Irving Berlin song

I wasn't exactly dreaming of a white St. Stephen's Day, or a white New Year, but it has been kind of nice.  As long as we don't get more for me to have to shovel, I'm fine with it sticking around as long as it might last. Goodness, it was cold this morning, though!

Today's word

heliacal \hih-LYE-uh-kul\ - relating to or near the sun; used especially of the last setting of a star before and its first rising after invisibility due to conjunction with the sun's rising and setting

I had heard of this word before, and perhaps had seen its meaning, but completely misinterpreted it when I saw it as today's WOTD.