*Now* it's over, but only for now?

I wasn't punishing you last night, but then, I don't think you know how hurt I was, so I don't think you knew how hard it was for me to choose not to intentionally hurt you in return. Still, while I determinedly kept contact with you, I could not respond to you as you wanted. I'm sorry. I wanted to; I just couldn't. And I know that must have hurt you even though that wasn't my intent.

We can't be close when you make entertainment decisions that push me away. I know, guys are supposed to be up for it any time, and women are supposed to need emotional closeness first. Maybe you always feel emotionally close to me, even as you make decisions that distance us? But if the stereotype about guys is mostly true, then I am definitely an exception.

I was concerned this morning, when you didn't respond to me in turn, that we might be getting caught up in a cycle of hurt and rejection, but once you were awake that didn't seem to be the case. So I hope that this is behind us, at least until the next time that something you want to watch takes precedence over our time together. Just last weekend you said that you didn't want it to be this way anymore. Don't you see the choices you make do this to us?

This morning I just want to withdraw from everything I do. I don't think I would survive that, though.