So this morning I was feeling amorous. But my bride wasn't, and apparently said so but I didn't hear her. So a little while later she basically whined, practically pleading with me that she didn't want to. First I was hurt that she did; she could have just said as much and that would have been fine with me. Then she explained that she'd already said so, and then I felt terrible for how she must have felt. But I was not trying to be insistent, I just hadn't heard her.
We have a lot of history here to complicate this simple miscommunication. First, I don't hear well. Second, she has a record of thinking things to herself that she subsequently swears she said out loud. For instance, I'll ask her a question and look directly at her for her response, and her lips never so much as quiver, yet when I press her for a response it starts, "I said . . . ," when she hasn't really said anything at all. But I'm pretty sure that isn't what happened this time.
But the biggest thing is my history as a recovered abuser, which brooks no excuse for imposing my own wishes on someone else, especially in this area, even by accident. And for my wife to have felt as if she had to plead with me over this makes me feel like a complete turd.
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