sometimes it feels like i'm endlessly falling
falling
falling into shapeless, empty blackness
and it feels as if self-loathed failure is the only thing
the only familiar thing
that keeps me from plunging irretrievably into the darkness
love
even God's abundantly merciful love
doesn't feel real
i have to believe in it
i have to reach for it
i have to proclaim it anyway
despite my feelings
despite my failures
despite my doubt
despite its improbability
i must love as i am called
lest i fall farther faster and darker
i must offer hope
and grab just a little of that lifeline for myself
as i cast it toward the people i love
God please keep speaking hope and love through this shattered vessel
No comments:
Post a Comment