The Two Standards, part 2

Weekends with the kids and urgent household projects allow no time for reflection. So "the hurrier I go, the behinder I get."

Jesus calls first of all for a basic and indestructible trust in God and to believe in the goodness of life notwithstanding any adversity. The trust in God who is a real Father is the source of a freedom from the fear of loss of material and other goods . . . (ref: Mt 6, 25-34) - The Two Standards meditation, 143-146. Second Part: The Standard of Christ, the Way of Trust, Hope, and Life

Yes, I should be emulating the birds and the lilies more, and rejecting anxiousness. Of late I sometimes think that these other created things have more faith than I do. Those around me are noticing that I seem bereft of joy. They don't know the whole reason, though. It is not merely the extra burden placed upon us, which we accept with open hearts full of love for our daughter and grandchildren. I find that the things that have been said to me of late have undermined my primary earthly relationship more than I should allow them to do. I need to remember that if any thing is missing from my life, it is because I do not truly need it, for God provides for my every need. But that means believing in God more substantially than I find that I am able to do right now.

“The exhortation ‘Be not afraid!’ should be interpreted as having a very broad meaning. In a certain sense it was an exhortation addressed to all people, an exhortation to conquer fear in the present world situation, as much in the East as in the West, as much in the North as in the South. Have no fear of that which you yourselves have created, have no fear of all that man has produced, and that every day is becoming more dangerous for him! Finally, have no fear of yourselves!” - John Paul II, Crossing the Threshold of Hope, as quoted in The Two Standards meditation, 143-146. Second Part: The Standard of Christ, the Way of Trust, Hope, and Life

I know there should be peace in this for me . . .

"One can be very proud in a shabby suit! These false forms are worlds apart from the poverty and humility Ignatius describes as the characteristics of the standard of Christ” - Rahner, “Spiritual Exercises,” p.178, as quoted in The Two Standards meditation, 143-146. Second Part: The Standard of Christ, the Way of Trust, Hope, and Life

I wonder if this is the unrecognized story of my life and the root of my dissatisfaction.  All I seem to know for certain is that the diversions which I might have tended to seek out in my younger foolishness are certainly only a road to further unhappiness. I think I should be thanking God for the good sense (could it actually be "wisdom"?) to not seek things which would only make me miserable by moving me further from him, which would only make me less the person he has made and is calling me to be.

I don't know if this is exactly a case of choosing the second standard, but I know that the alternative would definitely be choosing the first one.