Saturday's annoyance

Okay, I was in the doghouse already, I suppose for making Sunday's meal before Saturday's was figured out.  But the thing was, there was good reason: I've already lost out on my tomato sauce by not making that a priority, so now I no longer have good tomatoes from the garden to make it with.  Now that we'd spent money on the apples, I wasn't going to throw those away, too, because of not making that a priority, either.  And the bread from market was only going to be good for about another day for the drip beef sandwiches.

And here's the other thing: I'd told the mrs. really early in the day that I was planning to go to 5:00 Mass, and we'd worked out what her schedule of events for the day was, which didn't include Mass. Now, it wasn't that I expected her to cook dinner while I was at Mass.  Quite the opposite.  I'd've bet a pretty big chunk of money that I was going to have to cook when I got home.  But I cooked the steak, and she did the mac and cheese when she got home from seeing her young friend off to homecoming.  I had to run to the store while dinner was being served, as we didn't have the blueberries for the applesauce as of yet, and when I got home I was displaced from my usual position at the table.

But I took the responsibility for dinner dishes and then sat down to dialogue.  After about 5 minutes of yapping at me, she did the same.

Now here's the deal: technically, daily dialogue is a "10-and-10": ten minutes of writing, ten minutes of sharing.  Now, we're not legalistic about that.  Sometimes we'll write for less time than that; especially she will, because she's not fond of writing.  That's okay with me.  But after she'd been writing for at most a couple minutes, the text alarm on her phone goes off, and she starts replying on it.  I'm still writing, mind you.  I was really into what I was sharing with her, and just getting into the feelings part of it that usually concludes the question. (How do I feel about that, HDIF telling you that, etc.)  Well, now I'm feeling mad, and it has nothing to do with what I've just shared.  It's that she's interrupted our dialogue time with text messaging.  So when we get ready to exchange, I calmly tell her I'm feeling angry right now.  So she gets up in a huff and storms off.  When I tell her what I'm upset about, she tells me that she was finished anyway.  So now I don't know whether to be upset that she interrupted her writing time to text or that she shortchanged it so much - by more than half, in fact.

We did share before bed.  But I was still pissed, and of course she still doesn't think she did anything for me to be hurt over.  She clearly didn't feel like dialoguing in the first place, still ticked off over the events of earlier.  And she felt defensive, indicating she was cognizant that she was at least partly in the wrong.