Last supper

Today is our last day here this visit. We have no idea when or where the next one will be.  Our son-in-law's assignment appears to be in jeopardy, and perhaps his career along with it.  But if things go as we thought when we left Ohio, our next visit will be in Hawaii.  This is so hard.  But at least we can now communicate via Skype.  It's no substitute, but it's better than not seeing them at all.

Self-fulfilling prophecy

It's amazing how dynamic a relationship can be. We spent a lot of time yesterday morning cuddling, basically patching up from a rough Saturday. Later in the morning, my response to a complaint about a result obtained when something was done the wrong way - seriously: the cheesecake comes out of the pan way easier if you take the springform side off  first - undermined our progress.

I've got to admit that I'm impatient lately over little things.  There isn't one particular issue; my biggest overall concern is over the direction of your life, in two areas.

I'm glad that you can volunteer, and that you can be such a great support to your (our) friends, but I don't think you have a very good balance right now.  I know there also needs to be balance in our responsibilities. The thing is, I'm not willing (yes, there it is) to pick up so much slack just so you can do what you want. Maybe it's more accurate to say I'm not going to do so much extra when I disagree with the priorities you've set for your time.  But we both know that I do plenty of that when there's a real need.

I wish you would notice things more, though. One example: dust bunnies happen because we don't clean on a schedule. We should. Sweeping is not just a "when you notice," "when company is coming," or even a once-a-week chore. But when we haven't done it, I'm going to notice and will usually grab the broom and take care of it.  And no matter how much I try to remind myself not to, I'm just not able to keep from resenting it just a little when I do.

The second thing is that so much of your leisure time is spent on programming that I'm not interested in, a significant amount of which really bothers me. It detracts from us getting time together, which we really need to grow. 

Skating

So skating was evidently not such a good idea.  Hannah seemed enthusiastic enough at first, and Nic came along after adjusting to the noise and lights.  But eventually Hannah wanted just to dance - which was fine - but balked at the idea of untying her own skate laces - which we'd just tied a moment before when she said she wanted to skate. A little while later, after Nic and grandpa had another go around the rink, he replied that he wasn't having a good time, and since his sister wasn't recovering from her pique, it was clear that everyone was done.   Oh well.

A potential setback avoided

We nearly had a very rough moment this afternoon when I received a text from her phone in response to telling her that I didn't have much to do to be ready for us to go skating.  The response read: "You are on my last nerv (sic) now."  I thought the misspelling was odd, and it was just enough to keep me out of trouble.

It turns out that she didn't send it. Our granddaughter was texting her aunt - for whom the message was also inappropriate - but sent it to me by mistake. Oops. Fortunately I didn't respond in a way that would have made things worse, and we were able to have a nice chuckle over it!

More of the visit

I slept fairly well last night on the inflatable. Was awake at 4 a.m., though that was only a few hours after I went to bed. Fell asleep in front of the television for a little while before that, but not very long or deeply. The sun rises early here, so it's hard to sleep in. I'm hoping for the nap today that I didn't get yesterday.  At least I got  in a short bike ride for about a half hour.  Maybe there will be another today, though it sounds as if skating may be on the agenda.

Well, I finally got a halfway decent night's sleep. I had to sleep on the sofa to do it, though.  Funny, too, how our standards change.  Two weeks ago I don't think I'd have described any night that way if I was awake three times during the night.  I'm still feeling wiped, so hopefully there will be a ride and a nap this afternoon.

I should make a cheesecake today for my son-in-law's 29th (yeah, right) birthday.

The joy of grandchildren

There's no joy quite like that from the squeal of delight from a grandchild who isn't aware you're coming from out of town until she sees you getting off the school bus.

A blogging fool

Wow.  If I don't write a word here while I'm gone, I'll still be over a post-per-day pace for the year.  I don't think that has ever been the case before, and certainly never this late in the year. I guess I've had a lot on my mind, even if they've been smaller things.

And yes, I realize that removing the penultimate word from this post's title is probably still accurate.

Today's word

intercalate - to insert between existing layers

The first part of the word is obvious. I didn't recognize the second, though.  But when you learn that it originally applied to the insertion of January and February into the calendar, it makes a lot more sense!

A dim candle

Today we begin a long journey together.  I hope we also resume a more intimate one.  We're going to have to talk about what is driving the distance between us.  I'm afraid you won't agree that it's something that we need to finally do something about.  So far, you've been great to support the changes that I've needed to make individually for the sake of our marriage, but don't seem so eager to make changes in this area.  It seems as if you don't think it's important, or maybe that you believe it's my problem.  Yet some of the things that we've done in the past together give me a glimmer of hope that we can continue to grow going forward.

We must. Any organism that doesn't grow, eventually dies.

i must find a better solution.

From Atheism to Catholicism

This book by Kevin Vost is about the influences that led the author from his Catholic roots to atheism, then those that led him back to a deeper faith than he left. Nietzsche, Russell, Rand, and Dawkins were chief among the former.  I'm just getting to the latter.

Two thoughts from Seneca

I'm reading a book - one positive side effect of my life, at present, since I haven't taken time for reading in so long.  The author is sharing on a variety of philosophical influences on his life, and has come to this first century Stoic.  Two quotes have struck me right where I am:

"There is no enjoying the possession of anything unless one has someone to share it with."

This applies beyond the material.

"There is nothing the busy man is less busied with than living."

This second is related to the thoughts of his predecessor Socrates, hero to the Stoics, who said, "The unexamined life is not worth living." Busyness spares us the burden of examination, I guess, and interferes with truly living.

Decision point?

I think I'm deciding that, as long as it isn't one of those programs that chases me from the room with a theme by which I have chosen not to be entertained - that is, if the selected programming offends merely my sensibility and not my soul - I'm going to have to sit downstairs with my computer or book just for the sake of spending time together.

Dynamics

I realize that when you were growing up, every time your mother raised her voice you were probably in trouble. I further understand that every time either of your parents raised their voice, one of you kids was probably in trouble.

But I am not going to be able to go the rest of my life without ever raising my voice in front of you. And when I do, it doesn't mean that I'm upset with you.

Benign?

The harm of some addictions may not be as severe or as obvious as others, but they can be more insidious for it.

Today's words

weltschmerz - 1. mental depression or apathy caused by comparison of the actual state of the world with an ideal state. 2. a mood of sentimental sadness

weltanschauung - a comprehensive conception or apprehension of the world especially from a specific standpoint

Gifts

It pleases me that two of the things I seem to do best are to love and to lead praise and worship. I know that neither of these things are of me. Thank you, God.

fragment

Uplifted by our songs of praise
By words prophetic and profound
I, cautious, wend my way back home

And yet, despite these joyful hours
The icy blackness beckons me
I longingly dismiss its call

A glimmer

I have what I think is a really great idea.

Now I just need to sell it to the appropriate audience.

And pray.

Not necessarily in that order.

An old poem

Eulogy

I sat beside the fragile frame that bore me into life
and asked the One who formed us both, who'd made her Mom, and wife,
And sister, aunt, and cousin, and to many, faithful friend,
to somehow grant her healing, and not let her life end.

My hurting heart He comforted with thoughts that I've long known:
the body's but a sacred shack for those He's made his own,
that He loves her far more than I and, though her work is done,
that He will never separate those souls who trust His Son.

I asked the Lord that He would please not leave me here without
this one who, from the outset, helped me through my times of doubt.
And He reminded me of you He's blessed me with today.
He said, "Your life is filled with love I'll always send your way."

I sat beside this empty shell, the pain gone from her face.
At last her features were restored with peaceful, loving grace.
Her life had been a gift to me, now death a blessing, too.
And in that silent, peace-filled room remained one thing to do.

I whispered, "Mom . . . I love you."

And heard back, "I love you, too."

A conflict

I know that you don't want to, that you don't think we should, as if there were any reason why we shouldn't.

I always, without fail, try to accommodate the things you think are important.  I think this is important, and I feel that you have dismissed my wishes without due consideration.  I am angry about that, but being angry won't accomplish anything except to drive us apart.  I'd rather instead just urge you to reexamine your reasons for disagreeing, and speak to me out of something more than insecurity, whatever its basis may be.

words of a prophet

Won't you come, kneel before me and worship? Oh, at least, come sit for a while, prop up your feet, and be captivated by all I have to offer you. I will tell you how you are to be, who you are to be, who you are glad you cannot be, who you cannot hope to be. Come, be enraptured, forget all your cares. I have more to offer you than you can ever take in. Just open yourself up to me and soak in my presence.

Isn't this what the television calls out to us?  Oh, don't get me wrong: in moderation, and with the correct viewing and mental filters in place, it can be a good thing . . .

Today's words

quokka - a stocky herbivorous marsupial (Setonix brachyurus of the family Macropodidae) of southwestern Australia that has a short tail

Gilbert's potoroo - a critically-endangered Australian marsupial (Potorous gilbertii), sometimes called a rat-kangaroo, described as pointed in the face and about the size of a rabbit

Round numbers, of a sort

Before I entered this one, I noticed my blog now contains 5⁴ posts, though not all are published.. . .

Today's word

xylography - the art of making engravings on wood especially for printing

And if you know this word, you'll never again be confused by the difference between a xylophone and a glockenspiel.

Rough weekend

I don't really know what to say about it.

Unsettled

You'd think that a day like yesterday, so focused on the Lord, would leave me feeling spiritually refreshed. It doesn't quite feel that way . . .

Today's words

And it's about time. It's been over a week since my last new one!

thole - endure

I share this in honor of my dear friends celebrating their anniversary today as they thole their time of separation.

I did learn something else, word-wise, in the intervening time.  The defer meaning "delay" and that meaning "submit to another's wishes or opinion" are actually different words with different Latin antecedents.

Enough negativity

Yes, we're going to miss seeing and hugging our daughter, son-in-law, and especially grandbabies so often.  We had 5 visits with them last year, and that won't be happening for the next couple years. But when we do, it will be in Hawaii!!

You're pulling my leg, right?

I really hope so.

But no, the primary reason that the flowers are dropping vast quantities of tiny petals all over the coffee table is not that I disturbed them with other stuff.  It's that they're over two weeks old, and it's time to pitch them. I'd have done it, but they're not mine.

Bad approach to life

I started my day by griping before praising and thanking God for my blessings.  This is not a good idea.

Exotic exile

The land of leis and luaus, of grass skirts and Kamehameha, conjures all sorts of fantasies of beaches and sunshine and happiness. It's where young military couples get excited to be going, but discover soon after settling in that a 600 square mile island doesn't leave much room for escaping a native population that resents you for being there, especially if you have the nerve to take any of "their" jobs; that it costs way more to live there; that an island sounds like an exotic place to live until you realize that you have to get on a plane to go anywhere else; that it's really hard to go visit with your family.

Our son-in-law will soon be stationed there.  If he and our daughter are able to connect with their fellow army families as well as they have at Ft. Polk, the first of the aforementioned concerns may not be much of an issue for them, as they have very little interaction with the local populace (such as it is) around Leesville. The second one is probably their biggest worry, and the last one is ours. I'm glad for their sake that they'll at least be stationed with Nic's brother, and am more than a little jealous that Nic's mom will soon have all of her grandchildren near her.

I'm glad they're excited to be going, and hope their experience there is way better than the other people I know who've been stationed on Oahu. But visits with our beloved daughter and grandchildren are going to be rarer, more difficult, less spontaneous, and way more expensive. Schofield Barracks is over 4400 miles from here.  At a first glance, we can fly for the bargain basement price of around $700 each, coach class, with two stops. Single stop flights seem to be about $300 more.

If I don't get to see my grandchildren via Skype soon, the expense may be a one-time issue, as I'm likely to kill my daughter when I do see her.

In retrospect

Now that the Christmas season is over, it's probably worth taking a few  minutes to reflect on my experience of it this year.  Since Advent and Christmas form one volume of the breviary, and they're so closely linked for me, it's probably good to consider them together.

Spiritually, I was really concerned with how the my Advent season began. I still don't understand why we didn't get the wreath out, which is usually such a useful tool for calling me to prayer early in the morning. I love praying the Office of Readings by the candlelight. Instead, two weeks of the season went by before I realized I was passing up an important part of my preparations. But an interesting thing happened in response to that realization, as I finished the Advent season very strongly but didn't have any sense that I'd "done my job" in getting ready for Christmas. As a result, I found I had momentum carrying me forward, causing me to reflect more on the mystery and wonder of the Christmas season than I ever have before. It has made for some neat insights and continued growth.  All that said, I can't help but think it would be more ideal and lend more consistency to my walk were I to carve out that time with the One who loves me most at the outset of every day.

I need to carry these times of reflection into the weeks of Ordinary Time, so I don't enter Lent feeling as if I'm starting from scratch, as I so often do.

Emotionally, there were some challenges this year. Being apart from our baby girl and grandbabies for Christmas for the first time was tough, and I'm pretty confident that it wasn't just we grandparents who found it so. I've also needed to remind myself of the nature of marriage: what it should and shouldn't be, what needs it should always meet and which ones it never can - indeed what really are needs and what are mere wishes.

And musically, it was probably good for me to consider what my role is in our parish worship life.

More on breathing (updated)

Following on from my earlier post: 

I love my wife deeply, but with apologies to The Hollies, she cannot be the air that I breathe. I love our daughters, and our grandchildren light up our lives; I love my dear friends with whom I walk through life, but they cannot be the air that I breathe. I could lose all of them; their presence is a blessed circumstance in my life that I cannot fully control. I wouldn't willingly give up any of them, but I mustn't turn them into idols.

Likewise, my job is important for providing for my family, my exercise program takes care of my body, my hobbies keep my mind and body engaged. Yet all of these gifts cannot replace the Giver of them all, who alone can be the air I breathe, and who gives me every other means by which I breathe in his presence.

And there isn't a person in my life for whose sake I would not give up my place in their lives, if it would help them to breathe him in.

And to return to the Hollies, and give them their due: the song doesn't say that she is "the air that I breathe." It says, rather, "All I need is the air that I breathe and to love you."  Since they're obviously singing to a woman, as long as I'm referring to the presence of Christ as the air I breathe, I suppose I wouldn't have a problem with singing this.

How to not suffocate

"This is the air I breathe: Your very presence living in me" - Michael W. Smith


If I forget to breathe in the presence of Christ every day, it doesn't take very long for me to suffocate.  I can begin to look for other air to sustain me, and even to disdain the refreshing breath of God's presence.

Oh, how I long to express more fully the insight that struck me as I heard this song on the way home tonight! What it comes down to is that, no matter how I'm feeling, I must seek the presence of God each day, and breathe him in!

Oops. It's over!

A couple days ago I wrongly reflected that "I'm not sure that I ever realized that Christmas falling on a Sunday gives us the longest possible Christmas season in addition to the longest possible Advent season.  Every calendar besides this one trades one against the other."

I forgot that the Baptism of the Lord is not observed on a Sunday in such a year.  Rather, we observe this feast
that closes the Christmas season today!

Until a few years ago, I confused this feast with the Presentation in the Temple. I think this was because of our practice of infant baptism.  It just took me some time to grow accustomed to thinking instead of the baptism of Jesus as an adult by John at the Jordan. So at first glance, this feast doesn't even appear to be related to the Christmas season at all, which seems to be all about Jesus' incarnation and nativity. Even Epiphany is about an event in the infancy of Jesus.

Yet if we look beyond the surface, we see that today's feast is indeed all about the Christmas season, and is closely tied to yesterday's Epiphany celebration. As important as is Jesus' incarnation, it would be useless to most of us were Jesus not the savior of the whole world (as Epiphany celebrates) as well as the long awaited Messiah of Israel. And in his baptism at the Jordan, Jesus is further revealed as God's beloved Son. So Christmas is all about increasing degrees of revelations of Jesus: as an infant, as Savior of his people and of the world, and as the Only-Begotten Son of God, born of the Father before all ages, who by the Holy Spirit was incarnate of the virgin Mary.

And again we see how the salvation Jesus brings is not an isolated event, but the woven totality of his entire life!

Of magi and kings

We hear the reading each year, and focus most often on the obvious contrast between the reaction of the wise men from the east and that of Herod the king. First, a few things about this story of which scripturally-cognizant Catholics are aware, which our Protestant brethren often think we don't know.

• There is no indication that the wise men were themselves kings; some have concluded as much based on the precious nature of the gifts they present when they find Jesus. 
• There is no indication of how many there were; we associate "three kings" due to the three gifts and a popular Christmas carol, but the number is not specified and this is mere conjecture. 
• There is no evidence that the magi visited Jesus at the manger. The account says that when they found him they entered "the house." It doesn't even state implicitly that they found Jesus in Bethlehem where he was born, though they were clearly directed to go there, and in the absence of any statement to the contrary we can probably safely assume that they found him there. The placing of the magi's visit at the manger is probably due to an amalgamation of St. Matthew's account of the former with St. Luke's of the latter.

That said, there were a couple elements of this story that struck me for the first time. First of all, I'm not so sure how different the initial basic motivations of the magi and Herod were. Though they obviously led them to very diverse responses, could it be that this was primarily because of their respective interests? For a tiny nation, Israel was strategically located with regard to routes between Europe, Asia, and Africa. If a new king was born, there could be good political reason to visit him and court favor with his family. It was reasonable for them to presume that the father would be the current monarch, so that was the first stop on their journey. Yet they were not so familiar with Jewish history as to realize that there hadn't been a true king in Israel for centuries. Still, when it became clear to them that the newborn king for whom they sought was not of Herod's house, they didn't settle for the politically expedient action, but continued on toward their original goal. Herod encouraged them in this, revealing how even evil intentions can work to serve the purposes of God.

Herod's treacherous response, of course, is clearly rooted in politics and fear. The beginning of the monarchy in Israel was marked by the relationship between Saul and David, and that didn't turn out so well for the man who was first king. When the account tells us that Herod was troubled, and all of Jerusalem with him, the latter is no surprise.  Even under occupation, Herod wielded plenty of local power, and his subsequent murder of the Holy Innocents indicates how ruthlessly he guarded it.

None of which is especially pertinent to us. What strikes me as more relevant is the issue of how we respond to Christ's presence. Like the magi, part of us wants to pay homage to the rightful king of our lives.  Yet, like Herod, part of us is dreadfully afraid of what his kingship might mean for us. Will we lose power to rule over our own lives as we desire? Will we have to give up the life we have come to know and love? Might we be undone, bereft of home and family and our personal kingdom by what this rightful King asks of us? We have the benefit and the curse of his life, by which he showed us the cost of his kingship. We know it is loving, but a love that we may not fully embrace without fully yielding to it.

So will we respond with self-interested expediency driven by our fear, or with dogged determination rooted in hope and selfless giving?

Different darkness

Not less. Just different.

When I met you

I knew some things about my marriage:

• I love my wife
• I'm often frustrated by our lack of common interests
• Those two things are always going to be true
• I don't deserve any better

I seem to have forgotten - or changed my mind about - the last one.

Yet I'll continue to lay down my life in the way I should rather than the way I want to.

A turn for the worse

I don't at all understand how a day that began with such promise turned into such a disappointment, such a confirmation of our status quo.

The thing is, I don't expect things would be at all better without it. I must learn a deeper appreciation for what is.

The benefit of doubt

If what I believe about God's mercy is true, I'm convinced that being less than positive about our eternal destiny is a gift to us, if for no other reason than that it helps keep the balance between self-preservation and despair tilted in the healthy direction.

Changed perspective?

When I was a sophomore in high school, I hung around a bit with a senior who worked at a Baltimore college's radio station. He did a polka show on Saturdays, and a few times I went to the studio with him, running errands, gathering news or weather from the wire, sometimes reading it or some PSAs on the air. He had a pretty bleak outlook on life, and had two favorite sayings to express it:

"Life is a shit sandwich, and every day you take another bite."
"Life is an abject mediocrity."

I never agreed with his point of view.

I hope your perspective is different now, Neal.

Holy Christmas season!

"Beloved, our Lord Jesus Christ, the eternal creator of all things, today became our Savior by being born of a mother. Of his own will he was born for us today, in time, so that he could lead us to his Father's eternity. God became man so that man might become God. The Lord of the angels became man today so that man could eat the bread of angels." - from a sermon by St. Augustine


I love how our celebration of the Christmas season allows us time to examine the mysteries of Christ's incarnation over the space of a few weeks.  Those who don't celebrate a formal season of Advent often use the couple of weeks before Christmas to a similar purpose, but I truly appreciate the way that the anticipatory nature of our reflections during that period, focusing on themes of prophecy, waiting, longing and need, prepare us to celebrate more fully this season of joy and fulfillment, wonder and awe.  Advent becomes an annual John the Baptist in our lives, preparing our hearts for the coming of the Lord.

Thus the Christmas season becomes full of more than historical images of mangers and shepherds, angelic heralds and wise men from afar.  Those ancient images hold great meaning for us; they're important for us to revisit each year, but they're not the end.  The beginning and the end are found more fully in John's account, which our parish has quit using over the last several years, to my frustration.

"In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God, and the Word was God." - Jn 1, 1


The light had come into the world, yet the world did not recognize it, a statement that remains true today. Yet these weeks are filled with reasons why we should recognize it, or perhaps with the results of recognizing it. And so we finally arrive back at St. Augustine.

I love how he uses irony and contrast to cast light on the wonder of Christ's coming to us. St. Paul did this, too, in elucidating how Jesus fulfills the age old longing of the Jewish people and extension of his salvific kingship to all peoples. And I love how the weeks of Christmas allow us to reflect on the implications of the Incarnation.

Too often we treat the holy days as if they are isolated.  I think this is because of our experience of the world in time, one event after another, which often appear isolated from each other.  But the best reflections on Christmas make the clear link between Jesus' birth and his mission, and treat his Nativity along with the rest of his earthly life, his death and resurrection, in the context of the difference they make for us. Too many of us are trying to be god in the wrong way, defining for ourselves good and evil (the original sin), seizing control of our lives in any way possible, interpreting the circumstances around us in whatever light best allows us to make the choices we think will have the best outcome for us. After all, if we are god in the same way as Jesus, it is up to us to make of ourselves what we may.

Indeed, I have a good friend who tends to view the nativity as a historical event that has had great impact on the world solely because of how Jesus lived and died, and what his disciples believed about him. He considers that Jesus was no more God than you or I, but recognizes that those who have believed otherwise have had a profound, mostly positive and lasting impact on human affairs.

But St. John and St. Augustine propose that Jesus Christ is God in a far different way, by his very nature before he was ever conceived in the womb for us. Indeed, they posit that, unlike every other person ever born, Jesus' birth was the result of a decision for the timeless creator to step into time in a unique way, so that he might deliver us into his love for eternity. The role of the ancient prophecies is not then to create a set of circumstances which Jesus must fulfill, but to allow us to recognize him because he fulfills them. Is it that sacrifice is necessary to appease an angry God, or that God who has seen all time knew that we would kill
the savior, and prepared us to recognize him by presenting centuries of law and prophecy that his life and death would fulfill alone out of the billions before or since?

Whatever is built upon fallacy eventually falls apart. Even the Jewish leaders who The Acts of the Apostles tells us whipped the disciples for preaching Jesus as risen from the dead said that if it was built on falsehood, this new movement would collapse. Christianity is built on the Godhead of Jesus, and has not only stood for two thousand years, but has transformed the world around it in the process. Yet this is temporal. Its true magnificence and miracle is how Jesus of Nazareth draws us into the eternal life for which we are created. The bread of heaven was conceived a zygote in the womb, and born in a manger for us, so that as we partake of him we are transformed by and into what we ingest.

Leftoverture

I'm thinking that the best way for me to make someone feel appreciated for doing a big chore would not be to walk in the front door, say "oh wow, good job, thanks," then leave another time-sensitive chore for them to take care of while I go watch television.

I was pretty miffed by this turn of events last night, and had a bit of the anger left over this morning. Still, at no point did I really express my anger to her; it seemed to me as if I should sit on it a bit and wait for some perspective. In retrospect, I'm glad I did, though I do think we're going to need to talk about this incident at some point now that the energy has dissipated from it. Otherwise it might come back in unfair ways.

Meanwhile, we get the benefit of reconciling without having really had a fight . . .

Rushing Epiphany, in a way

I would've liked to have left our tree up for another day, through traditional Epiphany. But it was dropping needles like mad, and I would've had to water it again without knowing how much more it was going to drink up, leaving me with a potential wet mess to deal with in addition to the needles and sap.

So the tree is down, the needles are swept up, the ornaments are wrapped and boxed, the lights are wrapped (though not reboxed, as I haven't decided whether I'm going to keep these or just go with the LEDs for next year; I think I'll save them just in case), and the area rug is relaid.

We'll keep the remaining decorations out through the weekend, and probably leave the nativity set out through the following weekend, until we close the Christmas season with the Baptism of the Lord.

I'm not sure that I ever realized that Christmas falling on a Sunday gives us the longest possible Christmas season in addition to the longest possible Advent season.  Every calendar besides this one trades one against the other.

A carefully embedded gem?

I'm trying to mine a meaningful nugget from St. Augustine's reflections in today's Office of Readings. It isn't that there isn't anything there, or that I can't get to it, but seems more the case that so much of it is so closely interrelated that any piece seems to lose its power when removed from what surrounds it.  I thought that I could grab an idea from the end that really resonated with me, but soon realized that its impact had only happened because it had been worked up to.  The beginning material hadn't seemed to do anything for me, but when I returned to it I saw how it had laid a foundation for what came throughout.

So read it for yourself, and see if it has any value for you!

But I find very powerful this idea of God giving us something we can handle to embrace in preparation for what we're not quite ready for as of yet.

Today's words

Courtesy of a bizarre words link at Merriam-Webster's site:

whiffle - to flourish a sword in sword dancing so as to produce a whistling sound
spanghew - to throw violently into the air; especially, to throw (a frog) into the air from the end of a stick
poltophagy - thorough chewing of food until it becomes like porridge
lipogram - a writing composed of words not having a certain letter
gyascutus - an imaginary large four-legged beast with legs on one side longer than on the other for walking on hillsides
hapax legomenon - a word or form occurring only once in a document or collection of writings
mytacism - excessive or wrong use of the sound of the letter m
axinomancy - divination by means of the movements of an ax placed on a post

Interesting insight into the criminal justice system

The following is not legal advice, but one citizen's best recollections of material presented to potential grand jurors.

Today I got to spend the day in the company of a team of Montgomery County prosecutors, learning how to serve on a grand jury.  I am not actually on the grand jury, but may be called as an alternate during the four month assignment. Here are a few things I've learned so far:

• Grand jurors are sworn to secrecy for life. Unlike trial (petit) jurors, who may speak out afterward but should limit themselves to things they'd be willing to swear to in court, grand jurors may never reveal what occurs while the grand jury is in session, including cases, evidence, deliberation, voting results.
• In the state of Ohio, there is no such thing as a misdemeanor quantity of cocaine, heroin, or LSD. If you knowingly possess, obtain, or use any quantity of these substances, it is a felony. Of course, there are different degrees of felony based on the quantity possessed, obtained, or used.
• You always hear the police and law programs talk about means, motive, and opportunity. None of these are elements that need to be proven for an indictment or conviction in the state of Ohio. Rather, the following elements need to be present:
  • ID. There are many ways of identifying the perpetrator of a crime. And while crime dramas seem to focus primarily on proving whodunit, this isn't the most troublesome element for prosecutors to prove.
  • Venue. The crime must have occurred in the county in which it is being prosecuted. One exception is that a homicide for which the victim's body is found in a county is treated as if that county was the venue for the crime.
  • Date. This doesn't have to be the specific calendar date, as for some types of crimes that is problematic to narrow down. Nonetheless, it can become particularly important for the proper application of statutes that have changed either before or after the crime is alleged to have occurred, as well as to provide the defense the opportunity to refute the charges. One time acts that happen at a specific, known time and place are not as problematic for this as things like patterns of child abuse and ongoing corporate crime. And, of course, there are statute of limitations implications, as well.
  • Statute. Basically, if an item isn't on the law books in Ohio, it isn't a crime, no matter how heinous it might be. And there may be different statutory degrees applied to the same basic offense, depending on the circumstances of that particular crime and how if fits into the defined statutes that may have been violated.
  • Intent, or mental state. This is the most ignored element in law-based entertainment, and the one law enforcement and prosecutors probably have to spend the most effort on. There are four levels of intent, and though some crimes are independent of the level of intent, others hinge directly on it. A crime can be committed:
    • Purposely
    • Knowingly
    • Recklessly
    • Negligently
    The severity of the crime with which a suspect can be charged and for which he or she may be convicted often depends on their level of intent. There can be other circumstances in which intent becomes less of a factor; for instance, abuse of a child doesn't require proof of intent, and the killing of someone in conjunction with another higher-order felony negates the need to prove intent to murder (except for a capital conviction).
  While motive is not an element that must be proven, it is possible for motive to play a role in determining intent.

I wish I were available to serve on the grand jury, and half hope that I get called in as a sub for a while.

Garbage not out . . .

Okay.  I understand that I need to respond when told that the trash can is full.  I completely get that. And I realize that taking the trash out is my job, which is really how I want it.

But if I don't get to it, it's kind of important that no one takes the bag out of the trash can and leave it sitting either on the floor or the back porch. In either of those locations, the dog is certain to get into it at the first moment when it is unattended. We have lived through this often enough that we should have learned from experience by now.

Tonight I was unaware that the bag was taken out of the can, and we left for our dinner engagement in a rush. We came home to quite the mess.

Today's words

rapporteur - a person who gives reports (as at a meeting of a learned society)
arborescent - resembling a tree in properties, growth, structure, or appearance

Both fairly obvious, especially the second, but both also new to me.